Wordsmith– a new take on swearwords

A character is backed into a corner and wants to swear.  Some readers are offended by curses and swearwords.  Here is how I decided to bypass the language censor in my work-in-progress, Unholy Alliance.  Admittedly my hero in Deadly Alliance spewed fuck and damn a few times.

Fletch (Grady Fletcher) my hero in Unholy Alliance is a lawyer.  He’s an alpha, and I don’t want to dilute his dialogue, but his job and environment leads me to invent swearwords.  Asshole becomes wormhole or asshat.  Fletch and Finn are cousins, and here is an example from Unholy Alliance:

“You’re up against organized crime,” Finn said. “Sucks when you realize how small and defenseless you are.”

“Wormhole.”  Ah, the ties that bind. “Will you pretty please give up your contact at the FBI?” Fletch gripped the arms of his chair until his knuckles ached.

“You are one lucky asshat,” Finn gloated. “I’ll phone Gary Guhleman, tell him you’ll be in touch. You’ll like him.  He’s an amped up hound dog. Hang up. I’ll text you his number.”

Try this– look up insults from other cultures and periods.  Change them to suit your story.  An ancient Roman said, “You curly-headed onion.”  Modern Chinese use the insult, “You turtle egg.”  Don’t forget body parts. “May you face-plant on goose poop.”

chatting-with-krinfo sheetcoffee

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